Monday 18 April 2011

First Dates

Morning all,

I thought I would steer away from memories tonight and talk to you about the hear and now. As you know I am 35 and going through divorce. Well I am happy on my own, but miss companionship. 

I have lots of friends and acquaintances but none I can say "you fancy going out this weekend?" they are all married and have families. 
My children and I are living with my parents, now this is fine and I am truly grateful they took us in, in our hours of need. I would have had to go to a woman's refuge which,  I would of done if I had no other choice. 
Anyway being back with your parents not having my own space or not much i can call my own is not so good. Also I get bored with their company all the time. I am always thankful for what I have got, so please don't think I am being ungrateful.

So what do I do to meet new people, I can't go out when I feel like it, I am a single mum, and not only that can't exactly go and sit in the pub on my own can I. 
So I joined a dating site, I enjoy chatting to people, I am a very social person. I chat to a few men, who are nice to chat to. I am not looking for love or sex, I am looking for companionship and if the other things develop from that then so be it. 

Now because of what I have been through I have somethings that I find a little difficult. I am getting better. I am just beginning to realise that I am actually quite an attractive woman. I am becoming confident in my looks. If I am out on a date or have a boyfriend, it takes me a little while to adjust, if they look at me, I find it hard and I wonder what they are looking at. They usually find this "cute" or "endearing". I get why do you do that? It doesn't make me feel uncomfortable, I  just not used to it, my ex husband never told me I was pretty or attractive, quite the opposite. So I think why they looking at me?
And the other thing is affection, now to me this something that develops with time. I have been on two first dates lately, getting on fine, having a good laugh and chat. But then they tried to hold my hand, cuddle and kiss me. Which makes me really uncomfortable as I don't really know them. One guy tried to corner me in a crowded pub, I end up having to knee him in the groin to get him off me. The other date, which was only last night, i politely asked him to stop, he just kept saying "I cant help it you are so beautiful I just want to hold your hand". So i kept pulling my hand away. Then he has the cheek to say, can you walk me back to the train station and wait for my train with me. : O. Leave me to walk back from the station, which is not in the nicest of places, 11pm on my own. What planet was he on, I am not a naive little girl. I said "here is a taxi rank, I am going to go back to my brothers now". He then said "can I kiss you?" So I kissed him on the cheek, he kept saying come on let me kiss you. I said no thanks, and got I'm the taxi. 
I think a kiss on the cheek is appropriate for the first date. Don't you? It really annoys me when people are in such a rush, why can't people just take things slow. 

Anyway got to get ready for work now.

Catch you later 

Anna x

3 comments:

  1. surely it is, but on the other hand i am sometimes to patient and dont get thing "running"

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  2. first of all, there is a great saying that i like "if you can't be happy alone, you can't be happy with someone". but nonetheless i understand that you want someone, that's ok. Now rushing is no good, by me, but people are starting to get used to that, and guys who can't wait to kiss you won't wait to leave you. but thats just what i think. good luck thou.

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  3. I am happy on my own, I have been on my own for 6yrs really. I am happy, but as I said I enjoy companionship of other people not just men, people! I just want someone to hang out with. I am a single mum and can't just go out when I feel like it I am restricted. I enjoy just chatting to people online from all walks of life. But I have to say I don't think I will bother meeting up with anyone for a while after the last two. I have made some very good friends that I chat to online. But don't think I will meet them in the romantic capacity. And also I was happy with my husband for the first 10yrs. It was the last 6yrs that it became unhappy. Driving test next month and I will be able to get out and about more:)

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