Friday, 20 May 2011

Letters from Doris

Hi all, hope you have all been well. I have been away from here since Easter , just haven't had time! 
Hectic life of a single working mum, well I have time now as I am at home ill lol come on all together now "Ahh" lol
Well been led here think about Doris, many years ago before I got married I lived in a flat, it was very small. It was a semi detached house, converted into two flats. 
Below us lived a lovely old dear called Doris, she lived on her own and did not have any family visit, her daughter would show up once in a blue moon. But the people next door to us, they were a lovely Christian couple. They would pop in and see her, also cooked her a roast dinner every week. Like I said a lovely couple. 
I was only working part time then, so when I was home I would pop down for a coffee. I would always feel bad that she would make it, but she would insist. I think she was just happy that someone was just visiting, not bringing her a meal or the health visitor bringing her weekly meds, just s visitor that she could make a cup of tea for. She was in her 80's, very hunched over, and very week. But I tell you that woman had fight and spirit. She always meant the best by people and loved to chat! 
Which is just as well, so do I! 
Anyway, one morning I could here the bell ringing. If she needed me she would ring the bell, an 80 year old woman hasn't got a strong enough voice to be shouting up the stairs. 
I always knew it was Doris, because she would keep her finger on the bell until she saw me come down the stairs. It used to drive my husband up the wall, it just made me chuckle, bless her. 
Anyway, I went down the stairs and she said, "I didn't want to see Mr *****  as I was a bit embarrassed"
"ok" i said with curiosity 
"Well I picked up a letter of yours this morning" which she then handed me, it looked like it had been delivered through a war zone lol
She went on to say, "I put the letter in my pocket, went to the toilet and as I got up it fell in" at this point I put the letter down on the stairs. Then she said " well I fished it out and it was wet, I wanted to dry it quickly, so I put it under the grill, sorry it's a bit burnt, hope you can still read it" 
I said not to worry Doris, I said have you used your grill to cook since, she said "ew no, it's got wee on it" lol so I went in and scrubbed the grill for her. I then took the pissed on burnt mail and put it straight in the bin, then scrubbed my hands. She laughed about it a few days later when she had realised what she had done. 
This story always makes me chuckle, I remember Doris with such fondness. She was quite rightly moved to a home out at Weymouth overlooking the sea. I was told she was very happy. It comforts me to know she passed away in a place with a beautiful view and being looked after. Love always Doris RIP x 

Anna x

Sunday, 24 April 2011

Fridge Rage!


I wake up this morning and I am really missing my boys, as I do every weekend they are with their dad. The difference is usually I would be getting them back at 5pm today, but I know I am not going to see them until tomorrow night. 
Easter is a huge time of year to his family. Not because of the religious aspect. No don't be silly. Why? chocolate.
His family family really go over the top. My boys will come back hyper because they will have done nothing but eat chocolate. 
They are always abusive to me when they come back from their dads, I dread to think what chocolate induced abuse will be like. Takes a few days to get my babies back to normal. Hence why he only sees them fortnightly.

You know how many chocolate eggs they are likely to bring back,  at least 15 each!!! Which they won't eat and I end up giving them to other people, melting and using in cooking or when they have been there so long throwing them away.
When I first started seeing my ex it really made me laugh that in every fridge, in his families houses, the drawer that was meant for fruit & veg was dedicated to chocolate.
He tried doing the same when we moved in together. It really annoyed me. No room for proper food, so I would take his chocolate out and put it in a tin, I say a tin, several was more like it. So I would have room to keep salad veg fresh.
But no by the next morning it would all be back in the fridge. After a while I learnt not to argue and just gave in. Which is probably where it all started. If I had only put my foot down about the damn chocolate drawer, he would have never start the control that he had over me. You do not realise how these things start which such trivialities. 
I don't actually like chocolate that much, I have to be in the mood for it. If I am bought a box of chocolate it will last me about a month. 
The kids don't see me eat chocolate or sweets very often. I have sweets and chocolate in the house, which is visible to the naked eye lol  They don't ask, don't ask don't get.  Over their, they are in heaven as daddy has a sweet tooth and he still has the chocolate drawer. 
To me Easter is about spending time with your family. Remembering what is important in life. And receiving wonderful cards and gifts which my boys have made at school. They made cards for their dad this year, although I was quite surprised that my youngest had written it out to his dads name and not daddy. Don't know how that will be taken. But as soon as they are gone it will be put in the bin. 
I keep anything like that, I have boxes full of pictures, cards. I think it's nice to look at when they are older and have families of their own, and if they start to loose their way maybe it will help them remember what family is about.

Happy Easter to you all and I hope you each have a memory that makes you smile today.

Anna x

Saturday, 23 April 2011

Flagpole Merry-go-round

Back to a story about the ex. Many years ago, about a year or two after we had been married. We went down town with some family friends of his. The Harding family. 
We were stood in the queue for the burger van on the centre, this was when they had those flag mast's all joined together in a circle in the centre of Bristol. It had seating in it and you could walk through from one side to the other. 
Well we were stood with the Harding family when a drunken ruckus starts with one of the Harding kids ( I say kids he was in his 30's) well a guy swang for him, he ducked so mum Harding takes a full punch to the face. That's it now he has pissed of dad Harding. Well by this time it had turned into a full on brawl. The police started noticing and came over to break it up.
Well what happen next....... 
The youngest son about 25 makes a run from the policeman. I am the only one not getting involved! Let them get on with it eh! 
Well the youngest son Dan, ran around the outside of the flag poles, a copper gave chase, around the flagpoles, then another copper follow's suit around the flagpoles. Dan's girlfriend ran after the policemen around the flagpoles!! 
Well the benny hill music popped into my head at this point. I was in hysterics along with most of the burger van queue. They did about 3 or 4 laps around the flagpoles then.............
One copper twigged what he was doing and just walked through to the other side and caught Dan, it was like there was a force field that prevented them just walking through it was so funny. By this time all the rest had been arrested, my husband had been arrested for his mouth. 
I was ready to go home, when Dan's girlfriend wanted to go down the police station and wait. I couldn't let a girl hang about in a police station by herself all night could I. When we got down their everyone else was released, but not my husband he was the only one that got charged, why? He did not throw one punch!
I tell you why, he had been so verbally abusive to the policeman and tried to annoy them by talking and shouting all night, singing and saying things like "freedom of speech, where is there a sign saying that i cant talk". I think the main thing that got him charged, he kept calling one of them Ginger pig !! 
Well I got a minibus for the rest of us. My Ex was up in court the next day and ended up with an 12 month suspended sentence. 

I should had an inkling of what kind of man he would turn out to be. I would never speak to a policeman or anyone like that. 

Anna x 

Tuesday, 19 April 2011

Iced Buns!

Telling you about curry on ice the other day I thought I might tell you about another icy tale. This time involving me! 

January 2010 it was very cold and very icy. I had walked up drop the boys off at school. I then travelled to and from work, walking and on the bus. Walked up the school and collected the children. I did all this and not one foot slipped. 
When I got home I needed to take a parcel to the post office, this was around the corner from the house. Less than I had walked all day, so you would have thought I would be safe!!

Well, I think you can guess what happened. Less than 500yards from home and I slipped! How annoying is that!!!
At first I laughed, because I felt stupid, then I tried to get up and could not put any pressure on my left leg. I managed to slide on my bum to the lamp post. You don't really know how cold ice is until you are sat on it let me tell you lol
Anyway, as I was sat their figuring out what to do a policeman had seen me fall. By this time the pain was getting worse. Well as soon as I see him I know I am not going anywhere but hospital! 
A neighbour was passing by and bless him, he took his jumper off and slid it under my bum, he rang home and his kids brought me a cup of tea and his little boys, gave me his thomas the tank quilt to keep me warm, bless him, thank you so much, never forget that. In the mean time, the policeman had called for an ambulance. A first responder, turned up and said that an ambulance would be here in about an hour. Brrrr you can only imagine how cold i was feeling. The first responder slipped on the same patch of ice,  then my neighbour almost slipped on the same patch of ice, a passer by, had stopped with her daughter, they slipped and where holding onto my neighbour to get passed the patch of ice lol by this point the first responder had given me gas and air for the pain. I started to laugh, quite a lot at everyone else slipping and sliding, it was like something on a sketch show, all holding onto each other!! 
Oh this gets better believe lol 
At this point another set of first responders turn up and another policeman as he has seen the crowd and has stopped to see if any assistance is required. Now I have 2 policemen, 4 first responders,3 people stood round and a partridge in a pear tree lol And each person slipped on the same patch of black ice. As every else told "ooh yeh, that's where she slipped"
What a commotion, and there's more.
Whilst I am pissing myself laughing at every sliding about. The ambulance arrives, by this time I had been on the ice for 3 hours. I have never been so cold in all my life. Making me cold just thinking about it!
Well they finally lift me onto the trolley. My neighbour was on the road side, which was just as well, because guess what happened.............

As they are pushing the trolley with me on it, the ambulance driver, yeh, you guessed it slipped on the same patch of ice. I, on the trolley went shooting into the road, a car coming the other way, so my neighbour, caught the trolley and stopped me being squished by a car. With the laughing gas taking full effect. I was in fits of laughter. Thank you so much to that very kind neighbour, I may have ended up unconscious as well lol 
I think the paramedic's where getting board with broken bones on the ice. Wanted something a bit more exciting to deal with lol 
I was then in hospital for 4 hours, had to be treated for hyperthermia and it took me 3 days to warm up again. Whilst I was sat on that ice, the temperature dropped to -4 brrrrrr. 

After all that commotion it was not even broken, just a severe strain lol 

I so need a cuppa now to warm up ;-)

Anna x

Monday, 18 April 2011

First Dates

Morning all,

I thought I would steer away from memories tonight and talk to you about the hear and now. As you know I am 35 and going through divorce. Well I am happy on my own, but miss companionship. 

I have lots of friends and acquaintances but none I can say "you fancy going out this weekend?" they are all married and have families. 
My children and I are living with my parents, now this is fine and I am truly grateful they took us in, in our hours of need. I would have had to go to a woman's refuge which,  I would of done if I had no other choice. 
Anyway being back with your parents not having my own space or not much i can call my own is not so good. Also I get bored with their company all the time. I am always thankful for what I have got, so please don't think I am being ungrateful.

So what do I do to meet new people, I can't go out when I feel like it, I am a single mum, and not only that can't exactly go and sit in the pub on my own can I. 
So I joined a dating site, I enjoy chatting to people, I am a very social person. I chat to a few men, who are nice to chat to. I am not looking for love or sex, I am looking for companionship and if the other things develop from that then so be it. 

Now because of what I have been through I have somethings that I find a little difficult. I am getting better. I am just beginning to realise that I am actually quite an attractive woman. I am becoming confident in my looks. If I am out on a date or have a boyfriend, it takes me a little while to adjust, if they look at me, I find it hard and I wonder what they are looking at. They usually find this "cute" or "endearing". I get why do you do that? It doesn't make me feel uncomfortable, I  just not used to it, my ex husband never told me I was pretty or attractive, quite the opposite. So I think why they looking at me?
And the other thing is affection, now to me this something that develops with time. I have been on two first dates lately, getting on fine, having a good laugh and chat. But then they tried to hold my hand, cuddle and kiss me. Which makes me really uncomfortable as I don't really know them. One guy tried to corner me in a crowded pub, I end up having to knee him in the groin to get him off me. The other date, which was only last night, i politely asked him to stop, he just kept saying "I cant help it you are so beautiful I just want to hold your hand". So i kept pulling my hand away. Then he has the cheek to say, can you walk me back to the train station and wait for my train with me. : O. Leave me to walk back from the station, which is not in the nicest of places, 11pm on my own. What planet was he on, I am not a naive little girl. I said "here is a taxi rank, I am going to go back to my brothers now". He then said "can I kiss you?" So I kissed him on the cheek, he kept saying come on let me kiss you. I said no thanks, and got I'm the taxi. 
I think a kiss on the cheek is appropriate for the first date. Don't you? It really annoys me when people are in such a rush, why can't people just take things slow. 

Anyway got to get ready for work now.

Catch you later 

Anna x

Sunday, 17 April 2011

Grandad the eccentric part 1

I know i was going to tell you another ex story but I would like to share my grandad with you. Both my grandad's have passed away and one of my Nan's. But I am truly privileged to have had them. My sons friend has never known what it is like to have grandparent's as they passed away before they were born. 
I can not imagine life without them. But I suppose you don't miss what you have never! Which I can relate to in other aspects of my life!

Well my dad's dad was truly awesome. All my grandparent have things about them that make me chuckle. But grandad Frances-Bovey. Well, he was known as eccentric in Lawrence Weston. 
When you pulled up to his house there were really tall hedges possibly 15ft maybe even 20ft. They were huge, and these big green steel gates. You couldn't see through them either. What lay behind those gates was amazing, as a child I used to think it was a truly magical place. 
He had the biggest pond, 30ft by 15ft. An aviary of beautiful coloured exotic birds. Contraptions, he like to figure out how things worked, I even recall seeing the front end of a combine harvester there once lol. He had a massive shed, where he built every young boys dream, and I was bit of a Tom boy, I thought it was great. There was a huge lawn an apple tree and tiny rickety shed at the very bottom. 
Now my grandad would go through phases of what interested him, it made him tick, kept him going as he cared for his second wife she had a stroke before I was born, I had only ever known her not being able to speak much and she could not use her left side of her body. So he was her full time carer.  I think his eccentricity kept him sane! 
In that big shed you know what he made...........

Trains, fully operation trains that you sit and ride on. You know the ones they used to have at Ashton court many years ago, my grandad made those, my dad has the last one he started in his shed, he plans to finish it in his retirement!  How cool is that , my eldest son would have loved to see him make one, he might get to watch his grandad make one, as I did with mine. 

Anyway one day, I was about 7 years old I went to visit my grandad. He said "Go up to the top of the garden, there is something up there for you" well when I got to the top of the garden, I couldn't believe it, he had build me my very own merry go round, only a small one with 1 train, but wow! 
Then he said " it doesn't work mind, but it looks good don't it" lol loved that man. I didn't care that it didn't work it was great and I sat on that train playing all day, I had a great imagination, I went all over the world on that thing.

When I stopped going on it he took it apart. I wish I had a photo of it : ( , mobile phones weren't out then, let alone with built in camera's ! Lol

Then the next phase came and what a cool phase.

I will tell you more about this phase another day, it involves popcorn !!!!

Anna x

Friday, 15 April 2011

Curry on ice!


When you are divorcing someone you start to look back on life. It is really hard to remember nice times, when you have been through the things I have. At the moment I can remember just two times situations made me laugh, in 16years that it pretty bad. I am sure there are more, but bad memories cloud them.  They may come to me and I am sure I will tell you when I remember lol

The first thing I remember was one winter in a house we lived in, on Bloomfield Road. It was extremely icy and he had decided he wanted a curry and was going to walk around to the local Chinese. Well Bloomfield road is on a slope. It was black ice.
He stepped out started to walk ...... Then ........ Now you are thinking he's going to fall aren't you. He started sliding, it was like slow motion, sliding gently down the hill stood up right, looked like he was snow boarding, ................well he couldn't stop. So he grabbed a black wheelie bin. Well it didn't work and he just carried on sliding,  him holding on to the bin, all the way to the bottom. I was just stood in the door way wearing my Micky mouse night shirt and matching slipper socks, check me out lol well we all have these embarrassing clothes somewhere. 
Anyway, he just kept sliding until he just came to a gentle stop. He let go of the bin and stood for a second really still. Went to move . . . Fell flat on his ass! You know I don't think we ever got that curry, and I can't remember for the life of me how he got back up the hill. I think I must have been to busy laughing to care. Lmao, still makes me chuckle now. 

The second one ................
Well tomorrow night perhaps eh!

Night for now 

Anna x